Archive for November, 2008

(Picard enters)

Friday, November 28th, 2008

My Thanksgiving train tickets are for Thursday morning and Saturday evening. Why not Wednesday and Sunday? Well, by booking tickets on low capacity days, I save eight dollars.

My valise is still one-wheeled from last time. The wheel is just hanging on by a couple of pieces of plastic. I still had two miles to trek, alone this time. I have few options, so all my junk went into the suitcase. I left extra early (allowing for only two hours’ sleep) to allow for the fact that the valise was hauled on my shoulders in a sort of fireman’s carry for cuboids. It wasn’t super heavy. I was mostly bringing home excess t-shirts, which outnumbered my pants by 4:1.

I thought that would be the strategy until I saw some other people, got a little self-conscious, and started pretending to drag it like normal. As soon as they got out of sight, I went back to the over-the-shoulders carry. Other people became more frequent as I approached the station. By the time I got there, the broken wheel had become shorn off completely and the plastic wheel guard had been worn down to a nub. I nabbed a seat near the back of the train and tried to sleep. For a while, I was really caught up in this Star Trek dream. I kept hearing the starship bridge doors opening and closing. Then I woke up and realized what that compressed air sound really was: it was the lavatory toilet shooting its contents into whatever godforsaken holding tank it was destined for, repeatedly, over the course of the ride.

I Am Legend

Thursday, November 27th, 2008

Alone again. With almost everyone else on the floor gone, I’m stranded until Thursday morning when my train leaves.

We closed the Harrison Gr1lle Monday night. That involves throwing all the food away and cleaning every station out, scrubbing them with hospital grade vigor, and eating all the leftover cake. I stationed myself at the dish sink with the overhead 180° water hose and sprayed all the food off the pans. The worst part is the sauces. It was sorta bad when my watch smelled like chocolate syrup from shakes. Now with l’eau de garlic mayonnaise et buffalo sauce on it, it smells like a super concentrated platter of wings from Applebee’s.

Then Tuesday afternoon, as I had been looking forward to for a long time, I finally got to see the old gang again (the Action Heights one, not the thugs from Chino). Neal skyped me into Borg’s room on his laptop webcam for the annual Returning Seniors match, wherein this year’s young upstarts on the Schol bowl team challenge the Old Legends. They set me (the laptop) on a desk and had an unnamed puppet holding the buzzer. (I couldn’t see them. I was facing the other team.) Apparently, I was just supposed to yell “buzz” or pound on the microphone or light a small fire in front of the webcam, and they would push the plunger for me. The audio quality was a little shifty because of the volume normalizing, because I think the microphone tried to cancel background noise, which in this case would be Ancy calling the questions. So I would hear a question like, “Name the lining….. ….. ….. fluid……. missionary….. center of the epithelial layer.” And that’s all I would hear, because the middle part of the question would be noise-leveled out. That’s why I wasn’t so sure about my answers to the ocular anatomy question. When I turned out to be right, Friz threatened to shut the laptop lid. Oh, well, we won. And I got to be god for a couple minutes as my visage was projected on the screen and my voice boomed forth from the ceiling speakers.

As Tuesday marked the end of classes for this week, dinnertime saw the departure of almost everybody on the floor, in the building, on the campus. As I scootered myself towards the library in the bright afternoon sun, the leaves rustled, the red brick blurred past, and not a soul moved. The zombies waited in the dark…