{"id":1422,"date":"2009-05-22T16:58:27","date_gmt":"2009-05-22T21:58:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/?p=1422"},"modified":"2014-04-07T09:22:22","modified_gmt":"2014-04-07T14:22:22","slug":"fk-you-lasagna","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/?p=1422","title":{"rendered":"F**k you, Lasagna"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Even though I&#8217;ve been eating it all year, I still don&#8217;t understand lasagna. I think we can move past criticizing that pretentious silent &#8216;g&#8221;. We&#8217;re all adults here. <\/p>\n<p>But as far as I can tell, Lasagna is assembled like a tower of cards; in alternating sauce and noodle layers. Topped off by a cheese and egg layer to prevent crisping of the noodles and to slightly emulsify with the sauce. <\/p>\n<p><strong>But<\/strong> lasagna is eaten from above like a cake. Fork goes in the top. So why is it assembled <em>sideways<\/em>? Certain foods are assembled horizontally, like sandwiches, but they&#8217;re also <em>eaten<\/em> horizontally. Lasagna is assembled horizontally but eaten vertically. What?! Who engineered this food\/wrote the eating procedure? <\/p>\n<p>Whenever I eat lasagna, the layers slide off each other and the structure of lasagna becomes that of that of a really poorly executed flan. Or is there some important secret technique to eating lasagna that no one has let me in on?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Even though I&#8217;ve been eating it all year, I still don&#8217;t understand lasagna. I think we can move past criticizing that pretentious silent &#8216;g&#8221;. We&#8217;re all adults here. But as far as I can tell, Lasagna is assembled like a tower of cards; in alternating sauce and noodle layers. Topped off by a cheese and [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[4],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1422"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1422"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1422\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3608,"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1422\/revisions\/3608"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1422"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1422"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1422"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}