{"id":2500,"date":"2012-08-08T00:08:24","date_gmt":"2012-08-08T05:08:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/?p=2500"},"modified":"2014-04-07T09:21:17","modified_gmt":"2014-04-07T14:21:17","slug":"urinal-champion","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/?p=2500","title":{"rendered":"Urinal Champion"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>There&#8217;s this old guy at work. Let&#8217;s call him &#8220;Dr. Elderly-Asian-Man-with-hit-or-miss-prostate&#8221;. I hate being in the bathroom at the same time as him because it always feels like I&#8217;m showing off how quickly I can pee. So I always slow it way down to make him feel better. And I have to do this multiple time a day because he&#8217;s <em>always<\/em> peeing. It&#8217;s exhausting.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There&#8217;s this old guy at work. Let&#8217;s call him &#8220;Dr. Elderly-Asian-Man-with-hit-or-miss-prostate&#8221;. I hate being in the bathroom at the same time as him because it always feels like I&#8217;m showing off how quickly I can pee. So I always slow it way down to make him feel better. And I have to do this multiple [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2500"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2500"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2500\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3517,"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2500\/revisions\/3517"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2500"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2500"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/tommy.lardbucket.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2500"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}