The Finite

It’ll be a pretty simple week. The Purdue University application is due by Friday. I can write an (optional, but strongly recommended) “Personal Statement” as an essay. There’s no limit or minimum of words. I was gonna turn in an original piece anyway. Purdue has one of the nation’s best pharmacy programs. But because I’m not 100% sure of going into pharmacy, it serves as a sort of backup school. My lack of true motivation also makes it a little difficult to write essay about how I would like to go into pharmacy.

There’s also a 3000 word essay for CWLT (pronounced “quilt”) that’s 15% of the final grade hovering over me at all times. The closest metaphor I can think of is Venegoni standing behind me with a shotgun continuously for the next three weeks. (As you can see, the metaphorical firearms become progressively larger and larger as the semester wears on.)

(‘BF’ stands for either Black Friday or BattleField.)

This is my first holiday shopping experience. I expected tears. I expected blood. I expected lots and lots of coffee.

My shopping actually began online Thursday morning when I ordered an ultra II 2GB SD card for better action photos and a cheap ($10.00) plastic tripod for better group photos. Unfortunately, both these things have “Made in China” stickers on them. So please, for your own safety! Don’t gnaw on my tripod or memory card!

All Thursday I was conflicted. Sales papers in Thursday’s paper indicated cheap flash media at Staples and Circuit City. (Oddly enough, Fry’s circular was absent.) Staples had a cheap SATA drive that I really had my eye on. Problems: my current motherboard doesn’t support SATA; I live in a neighborhood that is exactly 4 miles from all three local Staples. My house sits in the center of a circle of Staples. In the end, I decided to go with Circuit City for their cheap blank DVDs.

My sojourn began at 0430 Friday morning. My objectives?

The target Circuit City was at Northpoint. I arrived at 0450 to a mass of people that extended for 200 feet. I was three minutes into waiting before I realized I was waiting in the line for Shoe Carnival. I should have known better. The Circuit City line is the one that’s not completely female.

After getting in the right line and waiting until 0500, the crowd began a slow shuffle towards the doors. On the way, I passed dozens of discarded coffee cups and vacant lawn chairs. I saluted the fallen heroes.

Once inside, I immediately hurried toward the back of the store for the blank media. I detoured through phones, stereos, PC games, vaulted over a wall of Canon printers, and landed in the HDTV accessories aisle. I forged my way through two crowded aisles to make my way to the blank media section (which was bottlenecked at the entrance by two large bins of flash media. I grabbed a drive and an SD card, holding them in my teeth as I filled my arms with 250 cheap 8¢ DVDs and fought my way out.

After standing in a checkout line that snaked around half the store, I finally got home at 0610. Just in time to read the morning paper. Imagine my anguish when a Fry’s sales paper fell out that touted free (after rebate) video cards and flash drives under big letters that exclaimed “Today Only! 5AM!”

Never again. Next year, this won’t happen. It can’t. It looks like I’m camping out at 0300 at Fry’s in a year. Anyone want to come with? Think: (free flash drives, video cards, UPSs, card readers and keyboards. 5¢ blank DVDs.) I got a tent and a car. Who’s in?